i wrote a song or a poem:
yeux de baies yeux de biche
perdues biches perdues jus de baies
couleur perdue baies rouges comme biche
biche blessée tu as les flancs baies
blessée flambe forêt
… la forêt en feu les yeux brûlés
yeux de baies yeux de biche
honey pops and mango&passion fruit yogurt
i’m reading madame bovary… saying that feels like being fifteen years old… it’s funny how heloise dies
I got a job!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy……. it’s in a publishing company, they publish stuff about emerging markets and reviews about real estate finance but it seems so interesting? during the interview we talked about how i failed the exam for the ecole normale superieure lol and what poets we liked!!!! 😛🐢🐝🐣🎉 i thought i would never get a job (because i’m a baby)
i want to write about my secret. my secret is: the last days have been very weird and scary
i threw two mangos in the bin…. two days ago….
is there a way to make a lot of money quickly? i’m thinking £100-300/day . i heard non sexual escort agencies are a scam? does anyone know about this?
ps i’m wearing a red uniform dress today and just realised i had only half zipped it
i need to think through (i don’t know if it is the proper way to say it) what i want to do. i don’t know if i want to go to university. i think prep class ruined me somehow. the first year was ok because clara was my friend. the second year was ok too because that’s when i really got into films i think. i was very very lonely and would not talk to anyone in my class even though we were like 70. i had stopped to talk to my sister also because of some argument. i think i tried to befriend a girl called like her but it was hard because she was into foster the people. i said it was ok but i think i went really mad at some point around november, or earlier. i remember reading 2666 also and going to a philosophy oral presentation with the book and putting it down on the floor. my philosophy lecturer was very intimidating. i used to talk to one of my french literature teachers quite often, which was weird to me because i always thought talking to teachers was weird and unconceivable somehow. she even gave me her number but i never called her. i wrote her once. the third year was awful. i had lots of health issues. i think it was mainly because of my mental state but maybe because of heredity also. somehow i think i’m really obsessed with the fact that daniel wouldn’t be dead now if i had been prettier three years ago. it’s a really insane thought. i don’t know if i want to study or what i want to study. i would like to write but it is really hard. it is really hard now to distinguish real things from things i imagine. i can’t understand what i’m doing or how i want to present myself on this tumblr or what language to use.